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Hello there,

I came back three weeks ago from a vacation in Croatia. It was my 40th high school reunion, and a group of friends from high school and our partners all went on a bike-and-boat trip.

I unplugged for the longest time I've unplugged in many years. 

I'm not usually very good at unplugging, but it was so relaxing! I slept a lot, read a lot, hung out with my friends, watched the coastline float by, and took every chance I could get to jump into the Adriatic Sea (that’s me in black below with my friend Debbie, whom I have known since fourth grade. The water was a little cold and we had to work up to taking the plunge! But what a clear, sparkling sea!)

Originally, my plan was to put on a book coaching workshop in Croatia at the front end of this trip.

Since I was already going to be in Europe, it seemed like a wonderful opportunity to launch an event there. The Author Accelerator team and I chose a location and a hotel, signed contracts, booked rooms and meals, made a plan for coaching writers through the Blueprint process of starting a book, and talked to our certified coaches all over Europe about joining us to lead people through it. I was so excited about showcasing the incredible work these coaches do and showing the whole world how awesome they are.

But the event didn’t happen. We didn’t sell enough seats in the program to make it work.

It’s always hard to know why a business venture fizzles, but we announced the workshop the same week the war in Ukraine broke out and COVID was surging in Europe, and the world felt just a little shaky. Our optimism was a bit misguided for that moment in time.

As I went about my vacation, there were a few times I thought about that workshop that never happened — particularly when I was packing for the trip. I didn’t need the clothes I would need to coach and to teach. I only needed bike gear and bathing suits. It was a reminder that the workshop had failed, and that it cost me time, money, energy, and worst of all, confidence. 

Was it really all those world-wide factors that led to the cancellation of that event or was it… me? I felt a flash of fear that I had done something wrong (or more like a hundred things wrong) and that was why that writing workshop never happened. 

And I began to convince myself that everyone would now finally realize that I don’t actually know what I’m doing and that the business I built would come tumbling down. Maybe I didn’t deserve to even go on vacation — maybe I should just stay home with my nose to the grindstone and work, work, work to prove “them” all wrong.

Sound familiar? I know it does, because I hear it from our book coaches (and people considering our Book Coach Certification program) all the time.

So many of us slip into this way of thinking when we are writing books or building businesses. It’s that all-or-nothing thinking, or what I call catastrophe thinking, and it has the power to stop us from doing the thing we want to do.

Fortunately, I recognized it for what it was, and shook off that mindset before the plane even took off. 

I reminded myself that building anything is all about trying and failing. You do something, see how it works or doesn’t work, try to understand why, and either continue on the same path or try something new.

The creative process does not unfold in a straight and predictable way. Some of the things we try will lead to success and other things we try will fizzle and die, and there is no way to predict it. 

You have to do the work, regardless of the risk. There’s no way around it.

You can’t let the setbacks determine your destiny. 

I am on a mission to lead the way in the new industry of book coaching and I am committed to this work, even when it doesn’t go exactly the way I might wish.

My vacation turned out not to be a reminder of the failed Croatian workshop. It was the opposite: it gave me time to step back and think about why I do what I do, and what I love about it. It gave me a chance to reconnect with my motivation.

And while I was in Croatia, I got another really tangible reminder. I wrote about it on Instagram, but want to share the story here again for those who didn’t get to see it:

I just returned from a wonderful two-week vacation in Croatia ☀️ My husband and a group of our friends took a boat + bike trip to celebrate our 40th high school reunion⛴️ + 🚲️. ⁠

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My intention for the trip was to really take time off — away from my clients, away from my to-do list, away from creating curriculum, and thinking about the endless tasks of running a book coach certification business, and I did it — with joy and ease. I biked and swam and read and napped and walked all over small towns on ancient islands — except for one evening when we made port in the seaside town of Zadar.⁠

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Author Accelerator has certified more than 115 book coaches, and one of them happens to live in Zadar. I had seen @lidijahilje for years on Zoom, as she worked through our book coach certification program, built her business, served her clients, mentored other coaches and met the goal she announced when she started: to replace the income she made as a lawyer and do the work of her heart. And suddenly, I had the chance to meet her in real life.⁠

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Lidija met me at the boat with gifts from her beautiful country, tears of joy (she couldn't believe I was really there!), and a warm embrace. As she led me around the city, showing me where she went to school, where her law office used to be, and where she used to go to court, she shared what book coaching means to her and her family and how this work has transformed her life.⁠

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As she ordered us exquisite fresh seafood and the most aromatic and tender lamb, she talked about the ways she teaches her writers the nuances of craft and the specifics of story, and how in turn, she is transforming their lives.⁠

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I was immersed in the most powerful, living testimonial of the ways in which book coaching lifts up both the coach and the writer. It's work that empowers people. It inspires them. It gives them something that is much more than a way to make a living.⁠

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I went halfway around the world to get away from what I do — and what a surprise it was to discover in those golden hours with Lidija the deep-level why of it. ⁠

Dream vacations in Croatia don’t happen all the time! But we don’t need a big trip to reconnect with our why and remind ourselves why we are doing what we are doing.

If you have experienced a rejection or setback and you are struggling with a sense of failure or “they will all find out I am a fraud” thinking, I suggest that you do the following:

• Take a minute to recognize what is happening
• Find a way to STOP that thinking. You may have to walk away from the computer, step out of the house, go on a long walk – something to get you to find a new perspective
• Do something that reminds you why you are doing the work–and PRO TIP: it’s usually a conversation with a person who knows and loves your ambitious heart.

I'm talking more about this in a video published today on YouTube. Click here or click the image below to watch and share your thoughts.

Warmly,